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» Sony PS3 Playstation 3 60GB NEW, deliver and GET DRUNK «

Listing ended at December 18, 2006, 6:30 am
Original listing number:180062677194

Semagic 1.5.5.6U - blastradys @ livejournal.com About me and this dumb auction
Ok, by now everyone is familiar with Sony's Playstation 3. Yes, it's a great system I'm told and nothing beats playing Ridge Racer 7 in 1080p unless you're playing Ridge Racer 7 in 1080p and maybe getting a handjob at the same time.

By now everyone knows about the PS3 so why I would excersise my redundant muscles and post all the system specs here like a jerk. This is the 60GB version, who the hell wants the 20GB? Not this pirate, matey.

The unit is new and mine - preordered it from EB Games and got it only last week because all the first shipment went to stupid little kids who got their rich parents up at 2 in the morning to drive them to the store in their Excursions and get in line ahead of me.

I preordered this system with the hope that I could make some money selling it, yes...on eBay for more money than it's worth. But I was 11th in line and the pimple faced bastard ahead of me got the last system on launch day and I had to wait a week for it and by then the market was saturated with PS3s and PS3s held up to the camera by naked chicks with exposed left nipples.

But you see, I am poor. And I need cash. Why? Well, I will be completely honest:

My name is Rich - I'm 22 and the clock never stops. I was in school, twice, but dropped out. Not working right now and have a bit of debt to worry about. I live at home, yeah, like a jackass.

I hate this place, and hate living here. Every familiar face is a bloody Cutco swipe agaist my being. I think I finally know what I want to do with my life but I need money to pay off my credit card and other bills to get all my affairs in order.

My mom stuck me with a $900 dollar medical bill that I had to take out another credit card to shoulder. I bought a cool car 4 years ago and the engine blew the first day. I have spent so much more money than I paid for it, investing in parts and costly first time mistakes, all because of pride, I think, not sure. I don't know. But it's a god damn money pit and I haven't been able to get rid of it. Got it started today but hey, it doesn't move forward, only reverse! SWEET.

I was in Los Angeles last year and didn't move my car for street cleaning on Edgemont St. one day, so I got a ticket for $40. I didn't pay it, naturally, so now they are collecing on my ass for $140. A cop pulled me over last week for not having my seatbelt on for 10 seconds when I pulled out of the gas station - $25.

Went downtown (Chicago) the other day and my car got towed because I parked in front of the Cadillac Theatre. Yeah, I know, my fault, but hey, mistakes happen yeah? It was $160 to get it out plus two tickets from the lovely police worth another $100. Oh yeah, and my alternator on my working car went out yesterday, AWESOME.

Also, apparently, I owe the State of Indiana money in backtaxes, due to working in that state once 3 years ago. Shits!

So at this point some may wonder why I DON'T JUST GET A JOB. Well, I've had many jobs. Probably more than you. And this may be a deficiency of mine, but I never end up lasting more than a few months at any given place because none of them have been loves of mine, so after some time my head fills up with crazy ideas and fears of isolation and hopelessness, that I may be stuck there forever, deburring brass or laying sod or washing dishes or polishing polycarbonate eyeglass material or peeling off shingles.

Sometimes I think I may have made big mistakes early on which place me in shit job after shit job, that I may never recover from these mistakes and that they will haunt me, eventually casting me into such a dark, deep hole I will never rip passion from anything ever again.

I quit my last job at a machine shop 2 months ago because I ripped a part of my hair out at a drill press and they were assholes about it. I was looking at it today and it still hasn't grown back. Any of you know how long hair takes to grow back after it's been ripped out? I'm starting to get worried and it's depressing me. Oh well, can't really notice a teaspoon of shit on a whole truckload!

But I'm stuck here, due mostly to my own choices but I'd like to get on with it. Too much time is spent by people sending energy into the void - into other people's voids. I'm god damn tired of breaking myself for things and people and jobs that pay shit and don't offer insurance.

So back to the PS3. Yeah, I'd like to make some cash so I can move the hell out, and if you've read this far you probably realize that there is some desperate hook I'm going to throw to net more cash from you. And you're right, but it's not too desperate, I think, and might even be interesting if it all works out. But even if this shiny black blu-ray equipped girlfriend eliminator only sells for $850 or something, I guess that's better than nothing.

The Special Sauce
I will start the bidding off at retail. If you win the auction you will have the opportunity to pay an additional $250 to have me HAND DELIVER the PS3 and GET DRUNK WITH YOU if you live within 100 miles of Chicago, IL. $500 to deliver and get drunk anywhere else in Illinois or Indiana. Other states contact me and a price can be worked out. I will bring liquor. Or beer. Or both! Up to you. You pay for the booze.

This auction ends the night of the 17th of December, so there will be enough time to either ship this out to you or drive out and party before Christmas. Or whatever stupid holiday you celebrate. Also, I will include this magazine with the PS3; I think it has something to do with tractors:

Payment
I take BidPay (preferred), personal check (wait to clear) and money order, and also, begrudgingly, Paypal. I really hate Paypal. But everyone uses it. Kind of like Windows. Or Myspace. Or condoms. Well, not always. Ha ha.

I was planning just to put up the PS3 and the liquor offer, but all that other stuff up there just kind of came out and now you probably all think I'm a grade-A douchebag loser. And that's ok.

My Promise
But who's gonna drink with a loser, right? Well, I may be a loser, but I know how to PARTY man, totally. That's what happens when you're depressed all the time and have no prospects. So for the next seven days I will occasionally post pictures of me partying PROVING that I party hard and fast and swift, like a drunk ninja surfing and playing air guitar.

Oh yeah, and if you aren't 21, for legal reasons, don't expect the drunk deal. Feel free to still bid on the PS3, though. Not that I wouldn't party with you if you were under 21, but I mean, jesus, I can't really say I will on eBay, can I. So yeah, gotta be of legal drinking age to mount this hampster, metaphorically. If you're an 18 year old girl I'll still have sex with you, though.

And by the way, I'd like to remind all you potential bidders - if you are doubtful of my intention or ability to party hard - that I have god damn 100 percent positive feedback! Sure there are a few neutrals in there but who doesn't have those...come on man, I'm a valuable member of the eBay community! You won't get burned.

Pictures
But to start off here are some pictures of the PS3 and a piece of paper with my eBay ID on it, as well as some drunk pictures of me last week. Yeah. Picture of receipt too. Why are some the pictures in black and white? Because good black and white is nice to look at. And I didn't just desaturate these man, I used the CHANNEL MIXER, pizzah!

Oh yeah, you see that bow behind the PS3? Yeah, that's a god damn BOW. I found it it the basement. I don't have arrows yet but I'm working on that. Dude, I have a pimple on my NECK, what the hell.

If you have questions about any of this please ask using ebay's form, or contact me at the AIM name "blastradys".

Pay for this online auction using BidPay^Â® - Seller BidPay ID: blastradys

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Pictures of me getting sloshed:

This item was presented in category: Video Games » Systems

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